They’ll Carry Me Out In A Box!!!

My elderly parent won't moveIn the last 19 years we have heard this many times.THEY WILL CARRY ME OUT IN A BOX. You CAN NOT make someone do something they are determined not to do.
I usually suggest that the issue be acknowledged: “I know you want to stay in your home and I hope you can. Unfortunately sometimes things happen and you might have to move.”
“Let’s look at a backup plan. Let’s see what is out there but make no commitment. You leave your wallet, cheque book and credit cards at home and we will go have a look. I will put no pressure on you but if something ever did happen we would know what to do. One residence nearby has a waiting list of 400 people so some may wait many years to get an apartment.”
Take them to see one or two residences (condos or apartments) and say very little. Allow them to talk and carefully LISTEN to their comments. You will learn about their fears, concerns and desires. They may mention “ALL THE OLD PEOPLE!” or the tasteless food, or grumpy people… They may also mention the great activities or seeing a friend from their past. Take them home and LEAVE IT ALONE.

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